girls ~ don't let your man read this post

Or else you may be in grave danger of having to do what I did today. Choruses of "Well, if Andrea can do it...." will ring eternal through your house. Then you will resent my sweet self.

I mowed the yard ~ front and back.

I haven't mowed the yard since the summer of 2007 when Greg has his wrist surgeries and was not allowed to mow the yard. We only had a front yard then. Well, we had a back yard then too, but it was just dirt. 

What with the air show on Saturday and naps on Sunday, it didn't get done this weekend. Since Greg is King Fertilizer because his Queen requests a green lawn year-round, the grass grows quickly ~ even in November. I was feeling a little bad for Greg. He leaves for work in the middle of the night dark and comes home in the dark. I'm on track break. I offered to mow the yard. Apparently I had amnesia about what a pain in the rump this chore can be. I remembered today.

We are not supposed to just dump our grass clippings in the trash can. We are supposed to bag them. Greg doesn't bag them and I always give him a hard time. I tell him the trash man will get mad at him when he inhales a face full of grass when dumping our can. I tell him the trash man will get back at us one way or the other. I bagged the clippings that whole ding dang summer of 2007. In the heat. I wrestled with the trash bag and the grass catcher again and again. Now remember, since we uber fertilize, the bag needs to be emptied 1,700 times in the front yard alone.

Today I wrestled with that damn trash bag exactly two times before I just dumped the clippings straight in the trash can. Sorry, garbage man. 

When I mow the yard, I start out making nice, neat passes that are just about straight. I like the look of a nicely manicured lawn. Those guys who do this daily and get the light/dark stripe thing going in a lawn (how do they do that?) are spiffy in my opinion. But then, there comes the tree that I have to go around. Oh, and then there's that spot I missed while turning around. And, then I have to "vacuum" the grass because I spilled clippings while unhooking the grass catcher. Shoot. Now my lines are all wonky. 

I ran out of gas too. In the back yard. So I had to trudge that thing all the way back to the front to fill it with gas. I checked the gas before I started and thought I had enough to do it all. Not so much.

Let's talk about the swing set. I don't know how Greg mows around that thing. I couldn't even get near the slide! So the section between the slide and the brick? It's still a jungle. And the rest of the area around the swing set? Well, let's just say a seven-year-old attempting to give a high style haircut would've done a better job.

When I was all done I tried to use the leaf blower to get rid of all the grass on the driveway. Apparently when you don't empty the grass catcher enough, it just falls out everywhere on the way to the trash can. Last time I used the leaf blower, it took me 15 minutes to start the thing. This time, I read the instructions on the side first and it started almost right away. But I think I made a bigger mess with the leaf blower than was already there. Geez!

Mowing the yard is not my strength. It's not pretty, but it's mowed.